The Problem with Traditional Conservative Women

I don't think there is anything "wrong" with traditional gender roles because I believe in cultural relativism, so what is right or wrong depends on who you ask.

That being said, I wouldn't recommend the traditional route for any woman. Basically my mother was traditional. She stayed at home and looked after me, was a housewife etc. Then my parents got divorced and my mother was left with very little. She had no skills or career. You could argue that what my dad did was horrible, but remember I am a cultural relativist, so right or wrong doesn't matter. The fact remains that being traditional made my mother financially dependent and vulnerable. Putting yourself in a position where you are dependent on others and at their mercy is just plain silly. It's like giving someone a dagger and locking yourself in a room with them.

My mother is doing fine now with some help from me, but she would be much better off if she had not been traditional and instead focused on her career and aimed to be independent.

Furthermore, I would never want to be with a traditional woman because I think it's quite lazy to want to be at home doing domestic duties. I'd prefer it if the woman contributes financially to the household.

Five Rules to Live By

1. Work as if it were just something you do. You don't need to work hard. Try to enjoy whatever work you do.

2. Live a minimalist lifestyle. Have your own room. Do your own thing: Netflix, YouTube, writing, etc. Subscribe to Soylent (or Huel, Joylent, or Aussielent) so you don't need to be dependent on a someone else cooking or cleaning for you. Share accommodation with others to save money, but try to minimize socializing with those you live with.

3. Invest in a diverse range of high dividend paying ETFs. As fast as possible, live 100% off dividends from these ETFs so that 100% of your salary goes towards investing rather than living expenses. You live off other people's labor, not your own. When you get used to living off dividends, you are no longer dependent on your job. The true measure of a man's wealth is how many years he can survive if he did nothing. If a man can survive forever without work, he is a free man. Anything else is partial or full slavery.

4. Don't connect. Try to shield yourself from the world. Isolate yourself more. Use your dividend income to achieve this. Have your own room, don't connect with others. Live off dividends. Do your own thing. Be an urban hermit. Once you are achieved total independence, you can venture out in search of what makes you happy (dating, hobbies, etc) but you are safe in the knowledge that you can always retreat back into your fortress should you need to.

5. Never marry and never cohabitate. Marriage is slavery. Never have children either.

My Friday Night Watching the Movie "Unfaithful"

I did something interesting on Friday. I didn’t bring lunch in, but rather than go out at lunch to get food, I decided to just not buy anything and instead drink powdered tea. My mother has been to an Asian supermarket and has purchased powdered tea that comes in satchels. The powdered tea comes from Korea (from a business named Damtuh) and is made of ingredients like black beans, soybeans, and rice. Rather than going hungry, I found that I was able to keep myself quite full and get through the day. In the afternoon I also had two bananas and an almond latte. I left work right at five and went to the gym. I am thinking of measuring what I do in the gym so that I can track my progress. I am hoping this will motivate me more.

When I got home on Friday I had a big dinner of cauliflower, mashed potatoes, oranges, avocado, carrots, and potato. After this I drank two cups of green smoothie (a blend of green leafy vegetables, Earth Protein, and a banana). Then I had high-protein hot chocolate, which is pretty much just a chocolate flavoured protein shake mixed with soymilk and boiling water. I prefer warm beverages to cold beverages, so I like to drink my protein hot (in a mug rather than in a shaker bottle).

Given it was Friday night, I finished watching a movie on Netflix called Unfaithful. I enjoyed watching this movie considerably, and it was close to home for me because of the adultery and divorce between my parents. What I thought was interesting was that the couple in this movie tried very hard to shield their child from the adultery, to protect the child, but my parents didn’t do that. They pretty much tried to get me to choose sides, and then I was asked to bail them out because they were in debt. I followed them because I used to look up to my parents and respected them, but in hindsight I realize I was exploited and used. Basically what happened was my father took money out from the family home using a home equity line of credit, and he used this money to fund his womanizing and to start a family with a new woman, and then when everything was discovered, my brother and I were the ones who paid off the loan. All this shattered any faith or trust I had not only in my family but also in anyone. I simply don’t trust anyone, and I have now walled myself off from everyone. I don’t want or need friends or family. I will never get married, never have children, and I will do everything in my power to eliminate dependency, debt, commitment, obligation, and duty. The objective of my life is to continually increase my freedom by increasing dividend income, and I will use this dividend income to shield myself from the world and do what I want to do rather than conform to society, which wants me to be a slave so that, understandably, I can make money for businesses so they can pay dividends to their shareholders.

There are many things in my life that have traumatized me, and it’s easy to just dismiss my problems as first world problems, but these problems are still real to me, and any problem can be rationalized away by comparing it to an even worse problem. A problem is still a problem, even if it’s less of a problem than some other problem.

It's also easy to dismiss my problems by saying that I should just man up and take responsibility for myself rather than blame my parents, and I have done that. I don't blame my parents. I don't blame anyone for the atrocities they commit. I simply react and protect myself. I am taking action to wall myself off from society and become an urban hermit who is funded and protected by dividend income.

When I think about it, I like my life. I have Netflix now, and I am starting to watch movies now rather than just watch YouTube, and I have noticed how much movies socialize you into a conventional way of life. For example, while watching Unfaithful, I was attracted to marriage because it looked like the marriage that the couple in the movie had was very nice. However, this would not have been apparent had I watched YouTube because YouTube is brilliant at sniffing out what you’re interested in and suggesting you watch it, and I am simply not interested in relationships.

My plan is to either share accommodation with others and then block them out of my life as much as possible or to live alone. If I feel lonely, I can easily get some friends on Meetup or even Tinder, but if I meet a girl on Tinder I just want to be friends with her. I have tried using Tinder while travelling solo overseas and it works fine, and it even works where I live now as well, although lately I have just gotten tired of socializing, so I uninstalled the Tinder app and then installed Netflix instead. I’d rather spend a Friday night watching a good film than going out. The pleasure from watching a good film is so much better than going out. Going out is quite boring. Most girls out there are boring, and I think it’s because they are spoilt because there are so many men out there willing to entertain women just so they can have sex with them, and so women expect men to bring to the table a certain level of entertainment and for their efforts women will reward the man with sexual favours. But I don’t care about sex with a woman because, if I wanted sex, I can just go to a registered brothel, and there are plenty of registered brothels here in Victoria Australia. Going out with women is also expensive, and there is an expectation by the lady that the man pays for everything just to signal to her that he is rich, which is important for women because they want to marry rich men and take their money. Not all women are like this, but enough are.

Human Cattle Are Victims of the Conformist Consumerist Narrative

Don't be gullible. Don't buy into the conformist consumerist narrative that, to be a normal person, you must get married, get a mortgage, and have children.

Of course you will be fed the lie that if you have a spouse, a mortgage, and children, these status symbols show that you have conquered in life and have dominated, but in reality these expenses are huge (it costs $400,000 to raise one child) and you will be in debt up to your eyeballs. You will be forced to work a 9 to 5 all day and every day until you are very old, and then you retire and shortly thereafter you will die.

Even if you think you are lucky because you have found a spouse who financially supports you, being financially independent on someone means that you are their slave. There are many women who marry rich men only to find that they are financially dependent on the man. They spend no time at work thereby having no skills, which means if the man leaves them, they become unemployed and on the streets, which means they endure any abuse the man imposes on them.

Just like a cow in a dairy farm exploited for its milk and slaughtered thereafter so too human cattle are fed the narrative of marriage, mortgage, and children, and rather than giving up milk they give up their labor, their time, their effort, their freedom, their lives.

Work hard. Invest for yourself. Retire by 35. 

Thoughts While Attending a Wedding

I went to a beach wedding over the weekend. One of my relatives was getting married. I was told to wear beach formal, so I had brown chino pants and a floral shirt. However, everyone seemed to wear full formal suits, so I stood out. Anyway, it was a small wedding with only about twenty people there, so I didn't mind too much.

The bridegroom at this wedding was slightly awkward. He didn't really know how to do a lot of the wedding customs. When he was asked to dance with his wife during the reception, he didn't know how to dance. His speech was very risk averse. In fact, he spoke a lot like me. 

I kept wondering how I would be able to handle a wedding if I ever get married. I am shy with women, bad at dancing, and I am very risk averse with what I say.

Relatives and friends at the wedding kept asking me when I was getting married, probably suggesting that it was time for me to get married given I'm 32 now. When someone asks me when I'll get married, I always say, “I don't know. Maybe never.” I'm very cynical about marriage, and I'm not afraid to speak about it if anyone wishes to explore my thoughts in greater detail.

When I look at a wedding, I just see so much conformity, and the peer pressure and conformity just reminds me of high school. There's no reverence for freedom and doing what you want. The talk is always about following some set of rules made by someone. If you like someone, spend time with them. That's it. Why buy an engagement ring that costs $10,000? Why go through the whole wedding process? Why have a wedding cake? Why does the bride have to wear white? Why must there be a best man? The answer I suppose is just that that is the way it is. It is tradition or culture. There are all these costly and burdensome traditions, and what for? 

I suppose it is possible in theory to meet a girl who believes that marriage ceremonies and rings are a waste of time and money, but that still doesn't eliminate the risk of Family Court intervention in the event of divorce, and the Family Court can do whatever they want with your assets. There are just so many unknowns and so much risk. Anyway, I can go on about this all day, but the bottom line is I have no intention to marry, but that doesn't mean I don't want to get a girlfriend. I just feel like I should focus on working and investing now. Focus on girlfriends later.

Everyone at the wedding seemed to be in a couple except for one of the bride’s friends, a girl named Annie. She smiled at me a little, but I never really spoke to her. I Facebook stalked her a little after the wedding.

During the wedding reception, there were girls dancing a traditional Thai dance. One of the girls was beautiful. I kept staring at her. All this perving made me think about my dream of one day retiring in Thailand and getting a Thai girlfriend. Thai girls are just so beautiful. Vietnamese girls are nice as well.

My Experience Trying to Date a Prostitute

On Monday, after work, I felt tired and lonely again, so I succumbed to temptation and visited a brothel. Three girls were presented to me, and I selected a young girl from Korea named Sarah. She was very pretty, and I fell in love with her when I saw her. She told me she was visiting for one year on a working holiday visa. She asked me if I had a girlfriend or wife, and I told her I didn’t. She asked me why I was single, so I told her I was still looking for the right girl. I then asked her if she wanted to be my girlfriend and she actually said yes.

Anyway, because I felt like we both loved each other, the sex seemed more special and enjoyable. It was like she was my girlfriend. After it was over, we exchanged numbers, and I told her I would message her.

Two days later, I messaged her while I was at work, but she didn’t seem too keen. I asked her if she wanted to see me over the weekend, but she told me she was busy working. I asked about any other days, but she effectively said she was too busy working, so I told her I’d message her later. This kind of bummed me because I figure if she really wanted to see me she would make time for me.

Giving all these excuses suggests she doesn’t really care about me, which I suppose makes sense now that I think about it. She was probably pretending to like me when she was with me because that was part of the service. If this is indeed the case, I don’t have anything against her.

When I speak to people about the topic of intimate relationships with prostitutes, they always say it’s a bad idea because the prostitute only pretends to like you. She doesn’t genuinely care about you. But is this really a bad thing? If I go to a bakery and buy bread, is it a problem that the baker doesn’t love me? No, I just care about the bread.

Some people may say that they want others to love them, which is fine, but I don’t really think it matters that much what others think of you. Many people say that they don't care what others think, and they say this with pride. However, even though many people say they don't care about what others believe, in the context of marriage they typically say they want their wives or girlfriends to love them, and they care greatly about what members of the opposite sex think.

Has Feminism Failed?

I have been reading Are We There Yet? which is about feminism and whether it has made any progress today even though recent statistics reveale that women still earn about 20 per cent less than men. The study claims that women earn less mainly because they take time off work to have children.

Arguements can be made that companies should be more child friendly and have subsidized childcare. The Australian government has already started implementing paid parental leave. In my opinion, paid parental leave--to be paid for by increasing company tax rates--is a poor idea. Companies will likely pass on these cost increases by decreasing wages and increasing the prices of goods. Everyone who has made a lifestyle choice not to have chidlren are punished so that those who decide to have children are subsidized. But some argue that government should encourage higher population growth with subsidies. But this runs contrary to the planned reduction in immigration that both Labor and Liberal are planning. How can you on one hand reduce immigration citing too high a population and on the other hand maintain subsidies like the Baby Bonus?

Back to the topic of feminism. In my opinion, the best way to increase women's pay is to somehow encourage them not to have children or at least to get the husband to do the childrearing. But the reality I see is that women themselves want to have children. Women themselves are the ones who choose to take time off work, choose to take care of children, and choose to do the housework. It is something they like and enjoy and according to their actions they seem happy to forego money for it. If that is what they want, perhaps it is better to simply let them have what they want rather than try to push them to do something they don't want.

Women nowadays have it good. For those women who choose not to have children--or have children but get the husband to take care of them--they often do very well in their careers. I have seen very many successful women who are very focused on their careers.

The statistic that women earn less than men also hides the fact that many stay-at-home mothers get subsidized by their breadwinner husbands. The husband goes to work and earns money while the wife stays home and takes care of the children and does the housework. When the husband comes homes, he gives maybe 50 to 70 per cent of his income to the wife. The wife's earnings in this case does not show up in official income statistics but it is a legitimate source of income for the wife nevertheless.

Lessons from the Tiger Woods Scandal

Revelations that Tiger Woods slept with multiple other females other than his wife have tarnished the clean image that many say helped him become so wealthy doing sponsorship deals with Nike, AT&T, and so forth.

During the early days when it was revealed Tiger was involved in a car accident and was alledged to have been saved by his wife, and when none of the other females (e.g. the cocktail waitress) emerged, many people I spoke to did not believe the rumors that he was sleeping with other women. They trusted him too much. However, after the evidence came, many of these people were disappointed.

I felt very confident from the very beginning that Tiger was cheating. A man of great wealth and talent is clearly going to get a lot of attention from women, so there would have been great temptation on him to cheat. Many people criticize Tiger by saying he is stupid to have slept with such ugly cocktail waitresses when he already had a beautiful wife. I find it surprising that these people judge woman by their appearance and occupations and then proceed to criticize Tiger's moral standards.

Even though I think Elin is very beautiful, humans naturally want variety. It is the reason why we get sick of our workplace and want to go on holidays.

The Tiger scandal also makes me wonder whether marriage is safe. Everyone says that marriage is worth it if you marry the right person. They say that you know you are marrying the right person if you are in a relationship with that person for a long time, which gives you an opportunity to check him or her for suitability. However, half of all marriages end in divorce, and surely these people who committed themselves to marriage thought they were doing the right thing. Furthermore, the world trusted Tiger woods when it turned out he was unfaithful, so if it's so easy for half the married population and for Tiger fans to be deceived, why would any individual think he is immune to deception from his spouse? People underestimate the power of deception. No matter how well you think you know someone, you really just don't know how they really are inside and if hypothetically they are perfect now, you just don't know if they will change in the future. Any potential husband or wife then needs to be aware of these credence attributes of spouses. They also need to be aware that not only can their spouses change behavior but their own behavior, tastes, and expectations can change over time.

What is one to do? Charlize Theron, a very beautiful woman, is not legally married, although she claims that she is "married but not married" to Stuart Townsend. The two have agreed to act as if they were married without actually getting married, similar to a de facto relationship. Some of my friends argue that marriage is important because it communicates to other people that you are together, but why would you want to communicate to other people that you are married? If someone thinks you are still on the market and tries to hit on you, just decline if you don't want it.

Another argument for marriage is the old-age argument. It is argued that it is important to marry because you don't want to be alone when you old otherwise you will rot in an stinky nursing home all by yourself, with nobody who loves you taking care of you. But if you have a wife, the argument goes, she can look after you, and you don't have to worry about dodgy nursing homes. This argument assumes that a poor-quality nursing home is the only option you have if you don't have a wife (or husband). But like everything in life, if you are willing to pay more, you get more. With nursing homes, you can pay more for high-quality nursing homes (or retirement villages). The other problem with relying on your spouse to take care of you is that she may not do it. Who is to say that once you are sick and bed-ridden your wife won't just dump you and go off with a healthier man? Love is fickle. On the other hand, if you paid a carer to take care of you, that person has a monetary incentive to take care of you. This is a personal preference but I have much more faith in the power of monetary incentives than I do in marital love's obligations or duties. If I had the option between having a family member cook for me out of love or a restaurant cook for me for cash, I would prefer the latter, and experience tells me that restaurant meals are far better quality than family meals simply because monetary incentives bring out quality in goods and services.

Man Drought? Check Out Cracker Personals!

On the television today there was a news story about a so-called man drought in Australia. Apparently among people aged in their 30s there are more females than males mainly because men are being lured overseas to places like Manhattan where there is a surplus of unmarried males. There is an article on The Age about this called Where Have All The Good Men Gone?

The article states the following: "The fact is there are 20,000 more women than men aged about 30. In economic terms this amounts to a supply shortage. Many of those women who might have contemplated producing a brood of new Australians could have trouble finding a partner."

This idea of a "supply shortage" assumes that everyone is out to get married and that polygamous relationships are not considered. Marriage I understand is a traditional social institution. It's something people do because it's what everyone else does. However, the average Australian has a $3000 credit card debt so just because everyone else is doing something it doesn't mean you should follow. My aunt and other members of the family have asked me whether I would like to get married. They told me that if I wanted them to go shopping for a women for me then they would love that. A lot of people have negative things to say about arranged marriages but I don't see the harm of a little bit of outsourcing especially since modern courtship rituals nowadays are highly complex. In the old days I suppose fathers negotiated with other families to sell their daughters to families with the most wealth. Nowadays the idea that women are owned by their fathers is looked down upon. Women own themselves and are given the freedom to pursue any man they want. The problem is that many women don't, instead expecting men to come to them. Then there are all sorts of complex questions such as whether you have to get consent from a female before you kiss her otherwise you might find yourself in a courtroom being sued for physical harassment. All this reminds me of an EconTalk podcast about Signalling in which Professor Hanson claims that when men and women judge each other they usually look at intelligence, wealth, and health, and that they usually engage in wasteful and inefficient rituals to prove or signal each of these competencies. For example, a man will try to be funny to prove he is intelligent. He will stay up late, party, dance, and play sports to prove he is healthy. He will buy expensive cars to prove he is rich. Hanson claims that this courtships ritual is inefficient and, for the sake of economic efficiency, single men and women should just approach a table and hand each other certified documents of bank accounts and titles of property (to prove wealth), blood test results (to prove health), and academic transcript or IQ tests (to prove intelligence). All this brings up many questions, e.g. how much money is being wasted per year on courtship rituals? To discourage these inefficient behaviors should tariffs be applied?

The whole idea of a man drought I think just doesn't make sense. The last time I checked the Cracker Melbourne Personals, there was a huge surplus of males and there were virtually no women there except for professional escorts who were just far too expensive. Why is it that just about every single woman who advertises here are looking for money in return while men are offering nothing.

When Women Complain about Having it All

Time after time we see studies showing that women do all the housework, all the child rearing, and so on. Even career women who work juggle career and family. Every time I see women read these studies they always complain. They complain that the man does not do enough.

What I find strange about this phenomenon is that the women themselves are complaining about something they choose to do. No one is forcing women to cook, to clean, or to raise the children. We do not live in a theocratic Islamic or Christian society where traditional norms are etched into laws that bind our day-to-day lives. We are free to live however we want. Yet surprisingly many women choose themselves to cook, to clean, to take care of the children, and to work. If they choose to have it all, why complain?

Sometimes women marry men who they think are kind people. Then it later emerges that they are lazy men who don't want to do any work. The solution to this problem is simple. Just get a divorce. Some women may not like doing all the cooking or cleaning, but maybe the man is providing so much to the family that she cannot possibly get a divorce. For example, if the man is earning one million dollars a year and is funding a luxurious lifestyle for the woman, then this woman may feel like she has to return some of the generosity.

Some men do not like doing the housework maybe because they think it makes them look less manly. Most women like manly men, so they shouldn't complain about a man who doesn't want to cook or clean. In fact, they should be happy that he is being a lazy manly man. For those women who want a man who cooks and cleans, then it is the woman's responsibility to filter out lazy men before marriage. This filtering out process can be achieved simply by asking the man if he would cook or clean. E.g. say, "Fred, if we get married, will you cook and clean for me?" It is like a job interview. I the man breaks his promise, there is always divorce. In most free country, leaders try to deregulate the marriage market as much as they try to deregulate the labor market.